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Is God the Author of Every Human Life?

http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-images-woman-birth-control-pills-image25835869By Jesse Jost

I want to look briefly at the topic of birth control. I know by bringing this up I am dangerously digging in a minefield of emotions. Many, if not almost all, couples use some form of birth control, and do so for very strongly held reasons.

When it comes to the birth control debate there are so many issues to consider: What is your motivation for having kids? Can you responsibly provide for them? Can you handle another child and still maintain a Christ-like attitude? These are all important questions to ask for most of our choices in life, but with birth control there is a deeper issue to consider first.

This watershed issue must be considered before all else: Is God the author of all human life, or does some life enter the world against God’s wishes?

If there is no God, or if there is only a distant “watch-maker” god, who set things in motion but has left the running of the world to our discretion, then of course due diligence should be given to every choice of whether or not to bring another child into this pain-filled planet.

On the other hand, if every life is created by God, then surely His wisdom trumps ours as far as when it is right to bring another child into the world. God doesn’t make mistakes and could be trusted every time He chooses to create another life. We are so limited in our knowledge of the future. We don’t know how secure our jobs are, what the economic forecast is, or if we have enough saved up for all of life’s unexpected blows. Conversely, God knows every detail of the future, and He knows what is best for us.

Remember, I am writing for Christians here: To be a genuine Christian is to be defined not just by right actions, but by our attitude of faith, or trust in God. Without faith it is impossible to please God. (Heb. 11:6) And whatever actions are not from faith are considered sin. (Rom 14:23)

Is God the Creator of Life?

Does God create every life? Or does child after child pop into existence while God anxiously frowns, wishing we would figure out “what causes that”? What does God tell us in His word?

“Rich and poor have this in common: The Lord is the Maker of them all.” (Prov. 22:2)

The Psalmist tells God: “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.” (Ps. 139:13)

“The Lord has made everything for his own purposes, even the wicked for a day of disaster.” (Prov. 16:4)

I could go on citing verses, but I think it is clear. Every time a life is conceived, it is the work of God. For us to say that some people had too many kids or had them too close together is to insult the Creator of the universe and say that He made a mistake.

If these two facts are true: That God is the Creator of life every time, and God never makes mistakes, then I really think this changes everything about the birth control debate.

Are you called to the mission field but think that children will be in the way? Who gave you your calling? Wasn’t it God? Can’t you trust him to know if kids will get in the way, or if they will instead open doors? Are you worried about finances? God promises that if we seek His kingdom first, “all these things will be added to you.” (Matt 6:33) Are you avoiding children for health issues? Does not God know this and care about it? Do you think God watches you conceive and says, “Oh no, I was going to heal you but now that you went and got pregnant, I’m helpless”? On the contrary, God is so tender, so compassionate to our struggles down here, and “He gently leads those that are with young.” (Isa. 40:11)

It all hinges on this fact: Is God the Creator of life? If He is, then He can be trusted every time. If God is not sovereign over every life that comes into the world, then having children is reckless.

My intention here is not to cite passages that prove that all forms of birth control are sin. On this issue we need to shout where scripture shouts, and whisper where the scripture whispers. What is so clear in scripture is that trust and surrender to God are critical components of a healthy relationship to God. But what that trust looks like will be different for each person. I don’t think scripture gives us warrant to condemn all non-abortive methods of birth control. I do, however, believe the forms of birth control that kill a conceived child are wrong. I also believe that sex was given to us for more than just reproduction. Sex in marriage, enjoyed purely for pleasure and to cement the bond of husband and wife, is blessed by God. There are also times when abstinence in marriage is acceptable for different reasons, but God warns to not stay apart for too long, “lest you be tempted.” (I Cor. 7:5)

It is so important that we do not judge each other in this area. We don’t know all the factors each person is dealing with, or the story that God is writing. God uses even our mistakes to shape us and teach us things about Himself. This article is not meant to be a universal prohibition against birth control (but people will read what they want to read) but to simply remind people of a truth that our world has lost sight of: That God is the author of every life, God doesn’t make mistakes, so every person conceived can have confidence, that God wanted them in existence. When we Christians put the emphasis on our responsibility to only have kids when it is wise, we imply that the conception of some children has been a mistake, here is a life that God never intended to be here. That is a terribly cruel message, and I know it is not one that Christians intend to communicate, but the logic follows closely and Satan is only too willing to point it out to the depressed person. Children who hear that they were “accidents” can have deep emotional issues that only God’s truth can heal. All we Christians can do for each other is challenge each other to trust God fully and remind each other that God is trust worthy. We can’t go around telling them what to do or judge their motives. Motives rather than actions are the key thing here. “Whatever is not from faith is sin.”

For Heidi and I, the choice to use or avoid birth control does not come down to whether the individual acts to prevent birth are in and of themselves sinful, but rather what does our use of them say about our relationship with God? Are we living with surrendered hearts, willing to follow wherever He leads? Or is there part of us that is saying “no” to God? Are we doubting His wisdom or power?

We are in the trenches here. We are not some 65-year-old couple finally giving their womb to God. No, in our stage of life our choice to have an open womb and trust God with the size of our family is very real and scary at times. Life never seems so fragile as the days leading up to labor and delivery. All the stories of women who have died in childbirth come alive with horrific vividness. At the same time, few things cast us on the mercy of God like children. Children are spiritually sanctifying. We humans are magnetically drawn to living for ourselves, but children remind us that our actions affect those around us and that little eyes are watching and wanting to copy us.

It is true, I am a guy. Some of you are probably saying that I have no right to force this choice on my wife. I agree! Heidi made the decision on her own to give her womb to God before we were married. You can read her thoughts on the subject in the link below. I do know however that the decision to stop having kids often comes from the husband, while the wife struggles to submit. The choice to trust needs to be mutual.

God loves new life, and one of the main purposes for marriage is children: “Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.” Malachi 2:15

Are you saying that trusting God’s sovereignty absolves us of responsibility? Should we also not wear seatbelts, because “God is sovereign when we die?”

The fact that God is in control of events does not remove our human responsibility to obey God with our actions. God sits as King “working all things according to the counsel of His will.” (Eph 1:11) But He also sits as Judge, giving us commands that we have a duty to obey and we will all stand before Him to give an account of our actions. (2 Cor 5:10)

God promises to provide for our needs (Matt 6) but we are still to work diligently to provide. (1 Tim 5:8) God is sovereign over the time of our death (“All our days are numbered,” the psalmist says). But we still are not to be reckless or “put the Lord your God to the test.” (Luke 4:12) God is the giver and taker of life, but we are to honor his gift of life by doing all we can to protect it. Seatbelts and helmets show that we believe life is a gift that should be guarded. Birth control can imply that life is something to be guarded against. Or that if we have unprotected sex God might make another life in error, and we might be “punished” with another baby.  God just won’t understand that now is not a good time for another life, so we have to prevent Him from making another mistake. These creeping lies will poison your walk with God.

“But I know moms who had rotten husbands and were reduced to baby factories. The children weren’t provided for. All the babies ruined the health of the mother. Surely this wasn’t God’s fault?”

We humans fail each other. But the problem is not the large family. There are families with only one or two children that fail miserably. Obedience to God should be followed in every area. It is not enough to say, “God, give me babies” and then neglect them. Divorce, abuse, and health problems are not because of too many children, no matter what the Accuser says.

If you are practicing birth control or have eliminated the possibility of being able to conceive, I don’t want you to feel judged by me.  God is the One writing your story. How He leads you is between you and Him. Heidi and I try to stay surrendered to God by giving Him our womb to use as He chooses, but trust is a daily struggle. God is abundant in mercy toward us all and is so quick to forgive.

If you decide to not use birth control the choice should not be motivated by guilt or fear of punishment. Rather it is an acknowledgement that what God gives is good! Children are a blessing; the fruit of the womb is His reward. (Ps. 127) How many of you would turn down a million dollars, even though it would mean extra responsibility and possible heartache? Isn’t a child of far greater value than a million bucks? Why would we ever want to say no to one of God’s greatest gifts? I always marvel at parents who intensely love every single child God gives them and can’t imagine life without them, but then they tell God not to give them any more. If this is you, think about what you would be missing if you had said no to God one or two children earlier. What are you missing now?

I sometimes feel like I could handle 6 or 7 kids, but 11 seems overwhelming. But then I remember that I am the oldest of 11 children (which is hard to forget, actually) and I think about my siblings who were 9,10, and 11 in the birth order. They bring the world so much joy and laughter. They have had such a huge Christlike influence on our own kids. I am so glad my parents didn’t stop at 8!

God will let us use medical knowledge and technology to prevent children. He will still love us with an overwhelming love. He lets us turn down spiritual blessings all the time, when we say no to prayer, or Bible meditation. But when you say “no” to God, you must ask yourself why you don’t trust Him in this area.

We live in a culture of death, a world that sees children as a curse and burden. Satan is the father of lies and will do everything he can to make us doubt God’s goodness. Trusting God will result in ridicule from the world and, sadly, other Christians. The devil loves to shame those who place their trust in God. I know the feeling of not wanting to appear hick or unsophisticated. But it is God I will stand before in the end.

I am not telling you that you must have a big family or that you are not following God. I know “open wombers” who have had small families or no biological children. The size of the family is not the issue. It all comes down to trusting God. God knows what is best for you.

Hebrews says, “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today,’ so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” (Heb. 3:13) I write, risking your wrath and friendship, to plead with you to trust God and to remind you (and me) that God is trust worthy. That He who did not spare His own Son, will give us all that we need for life and godliness.

“Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways!” (Rom. 11:33, NLT)

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love,may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Eph. 3:14-21)

This God can be trusted in every area of life!

Heidi’s Thoughts: read here.

 

  • Emily

    Very good post. I thought you might be encouraged to know that your thoughts are in line with the historical Protestant church (but maybe you already knew that). http://www.blessedhomemaking.com/2010/12/thus-saith-lordjohn-calvin-on-birth.html God bless you!

  • David

    I read your comments with interest. In light of what you write, two points come to mind.
    1. If children are a blessing (which they are), it seems that the context in which this is written implies (whether intentional or not) that those who are unable to have children are “not blessed”.
    2. If the logic of your writing is followed completely, a couple unable to produce children, now pursuing adoption are: 1) not allowing for God to “choose what is best” for them, and 2) lacking faith by choosing to bypass Gods “best” in their lives.

    I am curious as to your perspective on this.

  • Jesse Jost

    David, thanks for the thoughts. 1: It is God’s word that calls children a blessing, I am just trying to be faithful to the text. While children are a blessing, so is sight, the ability to walk, etc. God with holds good gifts from his children but that does not make them “unblessed.” God always gives the greatest gift – Himself- to all who seek it.
    2. If a couple is unable to conceive they have not said “no” to God. It was God’s choice and they need to trust Him to know what is best as much as the sleepless Mom with 4 little ones. Adoption is the spirit of true Christianity, requires trust, and is a terrific way to seek the blessing of children. No couple who has adopted should feel like they missed “God’s best” because they couldn’t have their own biological children. Thanks for the opportunity to clarify!

  • Tim

    Jesse, are you saying that adoption is not a good first choice for a Christian couple?

  • Jesse Jost

    Tim, not at all! You need to obey in what ever area God is calling you. Again, adoption is wonderful. Heidi and I would both love to adopt some day if God opens that door.

  • Carolyn

    Hi Jesse, I hope this comes out ok. While I respect your personal convictions and right to choose for your family, I do not see birth control as prohibited to Christ followers. I am pro life in that I don’t believe we should take the lives of the unborn, though I’ll admit that even that is occasionally murky in my mind as in the example of tubal pregnancy or a story last week of ISIS raping and impregnating a 9 year old girl who will likely die if she carries to term. However, I am not pro “potential” life, if you know what I mean. I do not grieve unfertilized sperm and eggs or siblings not created within my family. In regards to non-abortive methods of birth control, I cannot agree with you but am fine with people having their own opinions on this for themselves and family. There are, in my mind, too many examples or situations where it would possibly be wise to limit fertility. And while I would love to talk in ideals, it is not helpful for this discussion because its not typically during the ideal times that people really wrestle with this. It’s examples like these…some of which are theoretical, some based on people I know personally:

    A couple is on the brink of divorce and want to delay bringing more babies into an unstable home environment. They want to take time to work on the marriage before everything falls apart.

    A woman has a terrible debilitating hereditary disease. She requires frequent surgeries and treatments and the toll of pregnancy would be gigantic and/or fatal. while she is capable of conceiving, she decides to restrict fertility and trust God to give them a child through adoption even though they by all logic would never have been matched due to her condition.

    A couple, both of whom are high functioning with Down syndrome have found one another and, with help, will be able to marry and live together. Should they be encouraged to have as many kids as possible even though they are incapable of caring for them?

    A family living in remote jungle in poverty have 8 children and consistently get pregnant every 2 years. They are desperate, living in extremely poor conditions, no money, her healthy beginning to fail.

    A woman is in the unfortunate situation of being married to man who is abusive and cheats. Due to cultural reasons she fears for her life if she refuses him or tries to leave him. She fears she now has HIV and she cannot afford the drugs that would stop transmission to a fetus.

    I could go on, but you get the idea. I also contend that just because something is a blessing doesn’t mean we must seek as much as possible. Like wives – the bible says they are blessings. 🙂

    All that to say, I cannot see birth control as promoting a culture of death at all times for all people.

    Other questions close to my heart but not directly related to your post so please don’t take them as directed to you personally – it’s a command not a suggestion within the Bible that we care for orphans. I grieve the lack of emphasis and sometimes outright ignoring of this within our churches. Why so much emphasis on having as many biological kids as our bodies permit while kids we say are valuable life suffer in foster and orphanages? We fight for them on the picket line but turn away once they’re born. – myself included by the way. I very much struggle to trust God with my having a role in this call either through finances, time, or adoption. I bawled the whole way through The Baby Box and applauded that pastor’s faith and preservance and yet shrink from the thought of putting my heart out there in a similar fashion. May God give increased measures of faith and trust to all of us.

  • Jesse Jost

    Carolyn,
    You definitely bring up some cases where trust would be hard. We Christians have to be very careful in making universal commands for others to follow. But I have to stick by my main point. When a life is conceived, God is the author of that life. There is not a person on this planet who should feel like they are here by accident. If I follow your logic in each of those cases, you believe it is possible for God to make a mistake in creating a person who shouldn’t be on this planet. If God creates life carelessly, or recklessly, or he is not thinking through all the ramifications of this unique creation, then yes, I can see it would be wise to not trust God in this area. But what a scary world that would be! I am not urging people, “have as many babies as possible.” I am trying to remind people that God wants us to trust Him and be yielded to him. I am not writing for the state ethics board. I am challenging Christians to ask themselves if they are fully trusting God,(Whatever is not from faith is sin) or if they are letting a fallen world dictate their opinions. In those cases that you mention, the choice would be a hard one, but I just can’t see God making a mistake, or punishing a couple who is choosing to trust him. I don’t want to sound callous. Obedience is hard, and none of us does it perfectly. But God is so rich in mercy. Thank you so much for your thoughtful objections, I hope you don’t feel brushed off.

  • Juliana

    I think ,as a follower of Christ, I really would love to trust like that and deep down we know that is what it takes,”trust”, but we let our control issues take over. Remember when Sarah took things in her hands to fix things for Abraham. But God still loved her and blessed them,but their were consequences with his other son Ismael.

  • Debbie Lichti

    Despite His sovreignity God allows us to choose many things, to follow Him, to Trust Him, to seek after Him, to sin or to seek the way of escape, and He tells us that the flesh is weak. I do not know if I can answer everything for everyone in each situation but I tend to lean towards what Jesse is stating here. My own experience is that after six children we decided that we were done and within a very short time we regretted that decision. In no way would I look down on anyone for their decisions but I would definitly encourage couples to have children if at all possible, through adoption or whatever as it will truly show you how much God has loved you despite everything. Children teach us so much. Honestly do not always consider them the blessing I should but when I stop and think I know that I have been blessed beyond measure.

  • David

    Great thoughts Jesse. I also really appreciated Carolyn’s comment as it illustrated some things that coincide with my thougths.

    I completely agree with the foundational logic here that God is the creator of all life and He doesn’t make mistakes and that all children are a blessing I also heartily agree with asking the question of what our use of birth control says about our relationship with God?

    Having siad all that, I also believe that one of hte fundamental reasons behind our mortal existence is for us to learn how to make choices consistent with what God wants for us. That requires that we be free to make choices so there are many areas where God doesn’t have one clear answer. Sometimes we have the choice between being a doctor or being a preacher and He leaves the choice to us – allowing us to decide what we want and why we want it and how we will follow Him with whichever option we choose.

    I’m not certain that whether or not to use birth control falls into that category of two acceptable choices but I am open to that possibility. Carolyn gives some examples where I can believe that He might consider birth control to be a righteous option.

    Again, I’m not settled on this issue as if I have all the answers here but I do see the possibility that a person could fully trust God and still consider it acceptable to use birth control – it would depend on their attitude and reasons for using it. If they do so in an honest effort to follow His will then He might approve of the decision. If they do so in order to rebel or escape the consequences of their decisions then I can’t imagine He would ever condone that.

  • Juda Kubassek

    Be of good cheer, God does not lead every person or couple the same way. There are many husbands who, together with their wives, seek God’s will with the womb of their spouse before they have sex, and He gives them guidance – one child at a time. In these cases He does not count it a sin to prevent conception until He instructs further, since they are trusting Him to do so. It is best for each one to seek God’s will for their own life and not try to imitate the life of another whom God is most likely leading differently than you. On that final day it will be between God and yourself, and all that will matter will not be whether we did our own will, or our brother’s will, but His will alone. God bless you.

  • Jesse Jost

    Hey, Juda, I love your heart for God and deep faith! You are so right that we are accountable to God and should not judge our brother. I am looking for clarification though, are you saying that God leads some couples to use birth control, because if they don’t He won’t be able to stop Himself from creating another life? For the couple that wants to be surrendered with the womb, couldn’t they just trust that if God wants a new life here, He will create one, if it is not His time, He won’t – even if they don’t use birth control. I think this is an important issue. Is God bound to create a life every time a fertile couple comes together? Are some humans “created” against God’s perfect will? Love you, Bro! You have adorable kids!

  • Aaron

    Thank you. We believe the same exact way. This is a great tool for us because when we try to answer questions or share our belief with close Christian friends, the conversation goes in the wrong direction. This article says it all with right balance of facts in scripture with real life application of living out the biblical principle found in it. This topic more than any other always gets the genesis response of “did God really say?”

  • Meggan

    Very well written and intriguing article, you have given me lots of food for thought. I myself am a Christian who everyday has to ask God for guidance and understanding so that I am walking the path God has laid out for me and to help me not lean on my own understanding but trust in him and his word. If I understand your point correctly you feel that having an “open womb “is an important detail in our faith and that we have to trust what God has planned for us and not lean on our own understanding, God knows his plans for us and will give a “blessing “ or a child when he knows the time is right. While I agree with you about most of this, God does bless us with children and he is in control of all things and God does not make mistakes everything in life is because he wanted it to be. But where I begin to wonder in your article is God also has allowed humanity to evolve and grow and prosper we have come a long ways in some aspects from the beginning times. We have modern medicine and new diseases that we face all the time now. Am I to believe that someone with ovarian or breast cancer should ignore the advice of a doctor and have an “open womb” God also holds us responsible for our actions and wouldn’t want us to intentionally put ourselves in a compromising situation I would assume our health is something to be concerned and proactive about and during a trying time such as cancer and the recovery after maybe it is a good time to evaluate with prayer if it is a good time to be open to blessings. It might be a time to just focus on getting healthy so you can be open to a blessing. I kind of feel like you are implying that you shouldn’t be intimate with your husband unless you’re “womb is open”, that even natural birth control is taking the control away from God. Also what about families who do have “open wombs” and have yet to receive a blessing from God are they going against Gods will to see medical attention to help increase the chance of conception or to even go as far as to have IUI or IVF done to have a child? You mentioned in some comments that adoption is a great and wonderful path does this apply to all methods of trying to conceive? I’m not judging I’m just trying to clear my own questions because the points you made are things that have crossed my mind before and I am curious to know what others think about this stuff. And see how other couples navigate these waters while following the path God has laid out for them.

  • Jesse Jost

    Meggan, those are some very thoughtful questions. In light of issues like the ones you brought I up, I am continually humbled by the fact of how little I really know, and much I need to show grace to the struggles others are facing. God’s commands for us are universal and unchanging, but the application of them to our lives can be very murky sometimes. Thankfully, God knows we are dust, and doesn’t expect us to make the right decision every time. God puts the emphasis on our motivations more than our actions. He wants to be trusted, He wants to be given opportunities to show Himself strong. We are to acknowledge Him in all our ways, and He will direct our path (Prove 3:5-6) What God wants is for our actions to be chosen out of faith and based on truth, rather than motivated by lies and fears. This will still leave us with some very hard choices.You say that God would not us to intentionally put our selves in a compromising (I’m assuming you also mean dangerous) situation. Christians have always had to weigh obedience against the consequences. Jim Elliot intentionally put himself in danger and lost his life by trying to reach the Auca Indians with the gospel. Obedience to God will require sacrifice and our health will often suffer as a result. We must look be willing to suffer hardship down here for the greater reward of heavenly treasure. Now in regards to the couple that faces cancer and radiation treatment that threatens fertility. It is between them and God. As I tried to communicate in the article, I’m in no position to judge them or direct them. All I can do is challenge them to seek God, stay in His word, and make sure they aren’t operating by fear, or deliberately going against conscience, I quote again, whatever is not from faith is sin. In regards to your next question, sex can and should be enjoyed for pleasure and to bless and encourage your spouse. I don’t think a couple needs to “try to conceive” every time. The more important issue is that the decisions the couple makes for intimacy or abstaining are not motivated by fear or thoughts that call the goodness of God into question. Finally, you mentioned couples who seek medical assistance. I believe that there is a difference between seeking medical means to help conceive life then there is in refusing life. God uses natural means to bring life into this world, but He is still the author of every life. Couples seeking medical assistance still need to trust God. They also need to consider how God may be directing through infertility. Perhaps there is a child he wants them to adopt, or He is freeing them up for a certain mission field. Our need to trust God in every area is the main point. I hope these thoughts help, and that I didn’t come across as a know it all. I have deep sympathy for couples who are in the situations you described!

  • Tim

    Jesse,

    Thanks for facilitating this discussion. Your graciousness throughout is to be commended.

    I’ve been pondering your article for the past couple days. I think it’s time I weigh in.

    I think it was always God’s intention that humans would be a means through which His will would be done in this world (i.e. God’s good creation was meant to be governed by wise human choices). God is present in His world in other ways too, more mysterious ways, but wise humans were and are positioned in this world to bring order as stewards/rulers/governors. I think human consciousness (i.e. awareness, thought) coupled with God-given wisdom is a sign of that intention. I also think God’s command to humans in Genesis 1:28 is supportive of that conclusion. I don’t see anywhere in scripture where God revokes that command. We humans are just not very good at fulfilling it any more because we have been corrupted by sin. There’s certainly enough evidence of that in scripture. Moreover, the entire narrative in scripture tells the story of God seeking to restore his human beings to fullness through Jesus’ death and resurrection so that creation can once more reflect His goodness and order and love. And the presence of God’s Spirit within His people here and now is evidence that right now we can be in-part what we will be in-full when He returns. Incidentally, Jesus is the first fully human being, a sign of what’s to come for the rest of us (we will be like Christ who is the first fruit of New Creation).

    In other words, I think humans were made to make wise choices and to take action in the world as God’s stewards/rulers/governors. In this broken world, God continues to use wise human choices and actions to further His mission to bring about His Kingdom on earth. In this broken world we must sometimes choose between blessing A and blessing B, both of which are from God (see Mt 5:3-12 for some of the wise choices we make as Christ-followers).

    You say in response to Juda, couldn’t they just trust that if God wants a new life here, He will create one, if it is not His time, He won’t’. To that I say ‘Yes!’ The wise choice to marry and have sex for the sake of the Kingdom of God is to be commended as good and right (I think I echo Juda’s statement above). Through this series of choices and actions, God can be trusted to do His will. His perfect will is, at least in part, the creation of new life on earth.

    Now, is it not also trusting God when humans make the wise choice to not have sex, or to use other forms of birth control, or to not get married, all for the sake of the Kingdom of God? These are not choices and actions which the Bible condemns. On the contrary, Paul suggests a life of singleness, a life of abstinence (the ultimate birth control) for the sake of the Kingdom of God. I believe that God can be trusted to do what is good and right with these wise choices too. His perfect will is, at least in part, a path for some humans which does not include children, or marriage for that matter. These are wise choices that humans must make. These are also difficult choices. And they should be based on trust in God (i.e. on faith). Carolyn presents several scenarios where the wise choice for the Christ-follower seems to me to be some form of birth control. This makes sense to me, especially as I grow in my understanding of humanity’s active role in God’s world.

    I think the real issue (and here I’m echoing your article) is attitude and relationship. I think it always takes a measure of faith and trust in God to choose the Kingdom of God over the kingdom of Tim (or any other kingdom).

    So, I don’t see the conflict you apparently see between human involvement in procreation and God’s perfect will.

    Blessings brother and keep up the good work.

  • Jesse Jost

    Tim, I really appreciate your tone and well reasoned thoughts. I agree with most of what you have said here. I have also just finished editing my article to try and remove the tone that was more dogmatic on this issue then I had intended. Human involvement, and God’s permissive will, and God’s perfect will, are all important areas to consider. God honors human choice and takes our actions into consideration in determining his Sovereign will. In my original article, I seemed to imply that all human choice to prevent birth was from lack of trust or frowned on by God. That was more than I meant to say. Clearly, we need to give our brothers and sisters more leeway in this area. I write these articles not to shout my little opinion but to explore the matters further as I seek to be transformed by the renewing of my mind (Rom 12) Iron sharpens Iron and I welcome dissenting opinion. The conviction that has grown through this is that God creates every life, and He can be trusted to know when another life is wise. He will base his choice on factors we won’t always have access to. So while I cannot condemn the couple using birth control as not trusting, I do believe that any couple who uses their free will to give their womb to God to use as He chooses, is not being irresponsible. God will not punish the couple who is trusting Him. God is looking for the attitude that Jesus displayed in Gethsemane “Not my will, but thine be done.” The attitude that trusts God to know what is best is what God desires. We need to be careful to guard against the lie, that God will create a life in error. Responding to that lie is what fueled this piece in the first place. Thanks again for your input!

  • Tessebu

    If every life comes from God, and was God’s will, then what about the child born out if incest or rape? Does that make the rape God’s will?

  • Jesse Jost

    Tessebu,
    Thanks for the question. Rape is horrific and goes against God’s nature. I can assure you rape kindles God’s holy wrath. However, when God creates a life that comes from a rape, I believe it shows God’s power to bring beauty from tragedy. Even though that child was conceived in rape, that child is not an accident. God did not have to create a life, but He chose to because He has divine purposes for the life, and the child is exceedingly precious to Him. When we perpetrate the lie that the child conceived in rape or incest is an accident or not worthy of life (in the case of seeking abortion) we extend the evil the rape caused. No matter what events lead to conception, every life is created by God and valuable.

  • Anne

    Thank you so much for the wonderful post. I love reading the comments and enjoy your gentleness when exploring this topic. God bless.

  • Rebecca

    Jesse, thank you!!

    I have found that simple question, “Am I acting out of fear or trust?” in regards to my womb SO simplifying of an easily muddled issue. A couple particularly difficult pregnancies for me and five little ones later (four of whom were colicky), I find such welcome peace in trusting my Father’s loving hand. As you so rightly put, Jesse, that trust may look different in different people’s lives.

    Someone commented before me of God’s expectation of us to not intentionally put ourselves into compromising situations – as regards our health was implied, I believe. Just a small consideration to look at the wilful disregard for health in light of a greater good in the lives of many we so admire: the Biblical Esther going before her ruler on behalf of her people, Betsie ten Boom hiding Jews (plagued with poor health before even being admitted to a concentration camp), Biblical Paul willingly risking not just health but life for the spread of the gospel, the Chinese believer today, Jesus Christ himself. Is loss of health worth being a channel for Father God to create life?

    Via con Dios!!

  • Aaron

    Came back to read the comments again. You’ve done an excellent job in replying to each of them. Well done. my wife and I have yet to find very many Christians who believe this way. We are learning to give grace to those who have not come to this simple understanding yet. You’re doing good.

  • Aaron

    http://liveactionnews.org/amazing-indiana-girl-chose-life-after-being-raped-at-13-an-update/
    The link above is encouraging when it comes to the rape/incest discussion.

  • Justin

    I am not sure if this has already been said (there are a lot of comments to read), but could it not be said that you are doubting God’s sovereignty. Is it impossible to make those actively using birth control to become pregnant? Is it impossible for God to make pregnant a virgin? You know that it is not impossible, or you call the bible a liar. For the same reason of God’s control, both sides of this question are applicable.
    I am not angry, I personally have no idea which side of the side of the question is right. I admit I am not married (yet), nor do I have kids, but I am a Christian.
    I personally don’t think this is much of an issue, as long as you have a reason for it that is glorifying to God and not only for selfish reasons.

  • Amber

    Sounds like a lot of readers bring up the call of adoption. Anyone considering adoption but afraid that they cannot afford it should visit reecesrainbow.org and join the Official Reece’s Rainbow group on facebook. There is a HUGE community of support–emotional, financial, even spiritual at times. Some of these children have grants that would be available at the time of travel and that cover most or all of the costs, and there are MANY many others in different countries with smaller grants that can help a family bring them home.

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