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When Your Search History is Revealed

by Jesse Jost

There is no such thing as a private moment. One of the great corrosive lies spread through the invention of the internet and hand-held devices is that lust can be indulged privately and anonymously, without consequence and without shame. But there is always a record of the pages you have visited and what you have searched. Jesus warned us: “For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open.” Luke 8:17.

I wish that I could say that I have nothing to hide. That if everything I have put in the search bar was revealed, and everything I have allowed on my screen were put on public display, that I would have nothing to fear. It is to my shame that I have let lust hijack my curiosity and I have foolishly ventured into dangerous territory.

I visit a facebook site and it tells me which of my friends have checked in at this site and I have a moment of panic: are there pages I have peeked at in moments of weakness in the past that are currently tattling on me?

The fear of being found out is a powerful deterrent. But the damage that is done to the soul happens whether another human finds out or not.

I have been so angered and disheartened by the cases of sexual abuse and molestation that have come to the surface lately and I vow to never be one of the perpetrators.

But I also know the seeds of such abuse are planted in secret whenever I am tempted to look at another woman selfishly or indulge in a private fantasy. I am shocked by the secret desires that rise to the surface in such moments.

If I am not diligent to fight these private battles it will only be a matter of time before I am enslaved to them and a host of pain, brokenness, and betrayal will be left in their wake.

I want to be a man of integrity, and I want to lead my sons in the fight against sexual impurity and the degradation of women, but there is an enemy within that constantly lurks and threatens to sabotage my best efforts. Continue reading…

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